Amazing True Story About Mutual Understanding on the Abortion Issue

By Josh Sabey

As a filmmaker, I’ve never seen anything like what happened in Boston when we screened our film about abortion. The theater was totally packed. People there included the president of Planned Parenthood. A few rows back was the president of the largest pro-life organization in Massachusetts. Women who advised the Pope were in attendance. People who had seen friends gunned down in abortion clinic shootings attended. There were pro-choice and pro-life activists sitting a couple of aisles apart. These were people who really cared and desperately disagreed personally, politically, and publicly.

They had come to see our film The Basement Talks. This was almost certainly the most politically diverse screening of a film dealing with abortion and may well have been one of the most politically diverse screenings of any film in history.

This story started with two murders at abortion clinics and the court case and media circus that followed. But the case is never resolved because the murderer, John Salvi, was himself murdered in prison. That’s the story everyone was familiar with. It’s a tragic story, a sensationalized story.  

But there’s another, quieter story—one that took place in a basement. And that story is what this film was about. In an attempt to prevent future violence, three pro-choice and three pro-life women began meeting secretly. And these weren’t just average women, but community leaders. The heads of Planned Parenthood and NARAL were there. An Episcopal priest was there. The leaders of Mass Citizens for Life and Women Affirming Life and the Archdiocese Pro-Life Office were also there. These six women met for six years and recorded 150 hours of conversation. As filmmakers, we were the first people to ever get access to all these recordings. What we heard changed our lives.

These women had to invent an entirely new language. They had to find new words that wouldn’t offend each other. They agreed to forgo using over 200 phrases. For example, they wouldn’t say “fetus” or “unborn child.” Instead, they agreed to say “unborn fetus.” Communication was a minefield; if they were ever going to reach each other, they had to avoid stepping on a mine. It was a lesson in communication.

And more than anything, these women had to learn to listen—really listen. They had to set aside ulterior motives or defensive posturing. They had to stop formulating rebuttals. They had to simply try and understand. And they did. They heard each other for the first time. And they learned to respect and even like each other. And while no one changed their opinions about abortion, they did change their opinions about each other.

They all eventually agreed that participating in these conversations was one of the most important things they’d ever done. They came to understand the other side much more accurately. They also came to understand themselves better. They came to understand why they believed what they believed. In the end, the meetings did not hurt their activism; it actually helped.

The film ends with a montage of the political rhetoric and polarization across America today. The lesson is clear: we need more bravery. We need more people who are willing to do what these women did.

And as the credits rolled, the entire audience stood and cheered. Pro-choice and pro-life leaders, activists, and pundits clapped together. They cheered and wept. This group was united for the first time in a long time. And that was something to see. A profound glimpse into what is possible. A realization of e-pluribus unum.

And if you do this work—like these women did, and like you are doing at Braver Angels—you will realize that your enemies are rarely to be feared. And for yourself and your country’s preservation, you must meet them as the full-bodied, well-intentioned people they are. These are the people who will correct your assumptions. These are the people who will see your blind spots. These are the people who will expose you to yourself. What you thought was a curse might become your greatest gift.

This is not to say there is no risk. But our enemies are our brothers and sisters. They are not just to be overcome but to be wrestled with. And they will dominate you at times. And you will be tempted to break the connection. But before you do, please know that this country is held together by these connections and by the bravery of people willing to disagree honestly and civilly. This bravery is often not seen. Sometimes it’s kept secret. But this is how we’ve persisted for the last 248 years. This is how we will continue into the future. This is what it means to be a patriot.

Josh Sabey is the Producer/Director at Matters Media, and works in media at Braver Angels.

This information piece was sent to Peter Bergel on October 27, 2024.

Josh Sabey adds the following for different ways to access the film:

If you want to help spread this message, share this post, made by one of the biggest movie accounts on TikTok and Instagram:

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP88aFAg4/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christiesmovieclub/reel/DBUCPOfvcTc/

Sharing the film is especially important this week, because the feature-length cut is running on PBS WORLD Channel and Amazon Prime Video.

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